Read: August 2022
Inspiration: Came across on Amazon’s bestseller list; title caught my attention
Written with the help of ChatGPT, below is a brief summary to understand what is covered in the book.
“The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck”, published in 2016 by author Mark Manson, explores the idea that people should be more selective in the things that they worry about and the problems they try to solve. Manson argues that most people spend too much time and energy on things that don’t matter, and that this can lead to frustration and unhappiness. Instead, he advises readers to focus on the things that are truly important to them and to let go of the rest. The book discusses the ways in which people can identify their values and priorities, and how they can use this understanding to make better decisions about how to allocate their time and energy. It also explores the role of suffering and failure in personal growth, and argues that it is important to embrace these experiences rather than trying to avoid them. Overall, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fck is an eye-opening and unconventional perspective on how to live a happier and more fulfilling life.
Direct from my original book log, below are my unedited notes (abbreviations and misspellings included) to show how I take notes as I read.
Feedback Loop From Hell—people get anxious about being anxious, think thoughts about thoughts and judge self without need, striving for so much positivity can be a negative b/c not attain and constantly fixated on what lack to reach positive, trying to avoid pain is painful in itself, the less you care the better you’ll do, caring so much about everything will drain you—need to be thoughtful and selective, avoid caring about the unimportant things, it is about finding the pain/struggle you are willing to sustain—that gets you to happiness (must enjoy the process/struggle not simply imagining the result), push for self esteem in psychology has had negative consequences in generating delusion, important to see how one addresses negative parts of self, need to be self reflective to ask why feel a certain way then dig deeper to understand what that feeling is based upon (what standard and is it correct/inherent), can a problem be measured differently to reach different mental conclusion, Ringo Starr was actually second option to be 4th Beatles member after Pete Best sent off, not about always being happy/positive either but being able to manage negative in healthy ways, can blame other for your situation but ultimately it is your responsibility and choice on how you react/interpret/feel, the pursuit of certainty tends to produce further uncertainty and insecurity, comfort with uncertainty/lack of knowledge is key to security, Manson’s Law of Avoidance: we avoid that which threatens our identity (good or bad), ask yourself what if i am wrong and then what does it mean if i am wrong, if it feels like its you vs the world it is really you vs yourself (rarely all are wrong or unique to you), need to have internally achieved value not arbitrary metrics shooting for b/c others not sustainable and cause anxiety/stagnation, inspiration need not precede action, action first can inspire and motivate (do something if lack motivation, just act), victims and savers find one another but a self defeating cycle—best thing a saver can do is make victim take responsibility and do for self, savers take responsibility for others problems and victims blame others, humans unique as can conceptualize and think about selves abstractly/hypothetical situations, can also conceptualize death/world without ourselves—leads to “immortality projects” like name on building so self lives on (conceptually)